How Finding The Right Dress Is Like Finding The Right Man

I have to start of by saying that this story does have a happy ending. My search for a wedding dress took several years off my life. In summary, I went searching for something simple in a season of complicated, thus coming home, empty handed and frustrated.

I would like to direct this blog to the wedding dress industry: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I understand the reasons for having sample sizes only in all local stores. If a girl who is a size 12 wants to try on dress A and the store only has it in a size 8, she won't be able to get into it to get an idea of what it may look like. Well, the sad truth is, if I'm a size 2 and dress A at the store is only in a size 8 or 10 -- guess what, I still have no idea what this clipped up, rouched, folding wrap of white cloth may look like.

Additionally, if I am getting married in six or seven months and would like to try on a dress that is not in the store, but can be sent by the manufacturer, why do I have to wait four months to try it on? Is there really only one version of this dress in the United States that is being shipped around like the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants?

It is very disappointing to fall in love with a dress in a magazine only to find out that you have to drive for 14 hours to try it on -- in a version twice your size. I would almost advise my fellow brides to only look at magazine pages to get an IDEA of what you like. Then take that page into a local store and ask "Do you have anything similar to this?" before getting your heart set on one thing.


I admit my drama was mostly my fault. I didn't really know exactly what I wanted when I started looking in February. My pregnant sister and one of my bridesmaids went with me to David's Bridal. I started out wanting something with color, but those types only came in A-line, which my sister and friend quickly ruled out for me (along with 3 women I didn't know who were just watching from the sidelines). They suggested staying away from the ball gowns because I had a nice body and should not hide it under all that material. Alrighty.

My best friend, Vanessa, has been my most reliable fashion consultant for years. The girl's got style. So when she called me absolutely thrilled that she had found the perfect dress for me, I was elated.


This stunning Piccione dress is from Alfred Angelo. Vanessa lives in Orlando and found it at the new store in Altamonte Springs. I called and asked if there was a store near DC that carried that line. Nope. Nearest Alfred Angelo stores is in Delaware -- and that location does not carry the Piccione line. Sweet. My mother-in-law to be called the store in Pennsylvania where she lives. They had it in a size 10 -- that would be a four-hour drive for me. No thanks. Grrr.

I went to seven or eight other bridal stores in the DC Metro area. I tried on about 5 or 6 in each location, from the very high end to the bargain stores. Nothing screamed "This is the one," as I had heard so many other brides tell of. I envied them for that moment they stepped in front of the mirror and fell head over heels. Kinda like the girls in college who had year-long relationships with great, good looking guys who were in love with them. They looked so happy, so comfortable with each other. So not fair.

Moving right along, I went through a series of dresses that had a similar shape to the one Vanessa loved. Each one had something majorly wrong with it when I put it on.


This looks great from the side if I'm leaning against a ledge. But standing straight forward looking into a mirror, I looked like I was ready to offer the next couple who walked in the door Spanish Samba lessons. Olay!










This one had all the right elements going for it, AND it fit perfectly in the store. As I caught a glance at myself in the three-way mirror it gave me flashbacks to senior prom. Suddenly, all the lights in the store went out and I was dancing by myself to Eric Clapton's "You Look Wonderful Tonight," alone...again.






I cannot tell you how close I came to buying this dress. The women at the Demetrios Bridal store inside the Tyson's Macy's were so incredibly lovely, I wanted to invite them all to my wedding. They offered clear, honest feedback on each dress I tried on. I must have tried on every dress in this store. They had the best collection around and were open later during the week, which was great because dress shopping on Saturdays is like being stuck on a Jack Gyllenhaal fan bus. Not my idea of a good time. One of my problems with this dress is that the store only had it in ivory, which I didn't want. It was very hard to "imagine" it in white. And I have a pretty stellar imagination. The second thing was the asymmetrical line on the skirt. I was pretty sure I was looking for something symmetrical. I cannot say why.

One, two, skip a few, 99, 100. Yep, I tried on about 100 dresses. Granted, I tried on most of them by myself. Like I said, Vanessa is in Orlando and the stores don't let you take pictures so your personal fashion consultant can vote on them. I understand they do it to protect the designers, but I wonder if they realize they are losing sales. My sister, by this time, was too near baby-delivery time to be too far from a hospital. And my friend Amy is a lawyer and I could only take up so much of her time. (For the record, she rearranged her schedule several times for me anyway.)

Those friendly little email reminders kept prodding me to order my bridal gown because I was only six months away from my wedding date. Every store I visited warned not to order your dress less than six months from the date. Again, why-oh-why does it require so much time? I know they said it would likely arrive in four months, not six, but that we had to allow time for alterations. Bills get through Congress faster than a white dress can show up at my doorstep. Is it just me or is something very wrong with that?

Finally, I did what I should have done all along. I grabbed my friend Kate (the graphic designer) and drove about an hour outside of town to Annapolis. I found a store online that offered the Jasmine collection. I called first to make sure they had dress T147. They did. I had tried dress F106 on in a store in Vienna and thought the front of it had potential but I hated the back. (note: this dress comes in all white, without the black part on top.)



When I tried on dress T147, I loved the back, but hated the front. The nice women at Elena's Bridal saw that I was near an emotional collapse. They got on the phone with the dress manufacturer and asked if the front of one dress could be paired with the back of another one. Of course, they said. And that's the story of how Jasmine Bridal saved the day. The moral of the story is, if you date around and can't find the right guy -- make one up.

**Since I'm still not 100% happy with the front of dress F106, the seamstress at Elena's is going to order more material and reshape the top to be more of a sweetheart neckline -- the squareness of my broad swimmer's shoulders do not work with the straight line as the neckline shows in the picture. Those women are awesome and I am very excited to work with them when the dress arrives in August.

***One month after I put a deposit down on my dress, the fall line premiered with tons of dresses without the embroidery and rouching I disliked from Spring 2007/2008 lines. Dope!