Wedding Details: How A Monster Was Created

I am not the girl who has dreamed about her wedding ceremony since she was 12. I would prefer to wear whatever I feel like in the morning and not lay out my outfit the night before. I don't even own an iron, much less an ironing board. (Isn't that what a de-wrinkle cycle is for?) So when it came to ironing out the details of my wedding, I was less than enthused.

I think Mariah Carey had the right idea -- and you'll never hear me say that again. Beach, white flowy dress, orchids, close friends, champagne, done. Where I'm from, there are two seasons: hurricane season and not hurricane season. So in January 2008, the day after the proposal, a late summer wedding sounded perfect. And it may have been....in 2009.

Quickly letting go of my easy/breezy beautiful summer wedding, this fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants girl found where to draw the line between East Coasters and West Coasters. Planning in advance. WAY in advance. As I called around to book a reception venue, I was literally laughed at when I gave them a late summer 2008 wedding date. Apparently, couples here live for their jobs -- to the point where they get married based on when it's mutually convenient around elections, security screenings and fiscal quarters. Fine.

After re-doing my vision of my wedding day, Gary and I settled on October 25th. Everyone in Florida thinks that's a long time. Everyone here thinks it's rushing it. To each his own. I am now a fall bride. No biggie. I can fake-tan with the best of them.

Every article about wedding planning starts with mentioning a budget. Having a wedding budget is kind of like having a "type" of guy you like to date. You're more than welcome to start there, but you're more likely to end up with something completely different. With some help from both our parents, we're going to attempt to walk the tightrope of a D.C. wedding with...drumroll please...US$20,000 for about 100 guests. I now feel like the parable of the talents. If I don't invest wisely, I may not go to heaven.

Luckily, we found a very nice hotel in Old Town with a minimum price tag of $13,000 (always ask for a minimum price since their pretty brochures of $95/head does not disclose this information). What was just as important as the clean, spacious facility was the fact that the coordinator at the hotel was one of the most accommodating people I'd ever met. From here I used two facts about my new non-summer wedding reality: October is fall and the ballroom at this Hilton has brown, gold, hunter green and beige in the carpet, decor and entry way. It also has intriguing gold petal lighting on the ceiling and sconces. Working with and not against my environment will serve me well in my planning.

As one of my bridesmaids asked, drawing on her experience as a psychologist, "what do you want people to remember about your wedding?" Aka - what impression do you want to make on Gary's family and friends? (My family and friends already know me well enough that something too formal would not be my style.) "I want my wedding to be elegant, but not stuffy," I told her. "I want people to feel special for being a part of it, but I want to keep things simple." And of course, she wouldn't let me get away with anything less than "unique." It's a great word that my friends and family have come to use when referencing me in place of the word "strange."

Armed with my budget, my date, my color palette and my adjectives, I began to plan the rest of the details. The most important thing at this stage is to be open to inspiration because it can come from anything anywhere.